I don't think prohibition is practical. The Germans, you see, prevent it.
Look at them. I am sorry to learn that they have just invented a method
of making brandy out of Sawdust. Now, what chance will prohibition have
when a man can take a rip saw and go out and get drunk with a fence rail?
What is the good of prohibition if a man is able to make brandy smashes
out of the shingles of his roof, or if he can get delirium tremens by drinking
the legs off his kitchen table.
- quoted in "Educators, Authors." Los Angeles Times, March 8, 1908, pg. VI14. (An earlier and similar version of this interview appeared in Dallas Morning News, December 22, 1907 stating it was obtained by a W.C.T.U. woman during an Atlantic crossing earlier that year. In that version the last word "table" was replaced with "chair.")
What marriage is to morality, a properly conducted licensed liquor traffic
is to sobriety. In fact, the more things are forbidden, the more popular they
- Mark Twain's Notebook, 1895
Temperate temperance is best. Intemperate temperance injures the cause of temperance, while temperate temperance helps it in its fight against intemperate intemperance. Fanatics will never learn that, though it be written in letters of gold across the sky.
- Mark Twain's Notebook, 1896
It is the prohibition that makes anything precious.
- Mark Twain's Notebook
Also see: Temperance and Pledge
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